Say it Better

How What You Hear, See or Feel Affects What You Think or Do

This persusion technique probably won’t work on hormonally-hit teenagers (sorry weary parents) yet you could try it on spouses, co-workers or customers. Suppose, for example, you’re tired of the dirty cups in the office coffee nook. Try spraying the air with a lemony scent reminiscent of a cleaning agent. When those sloppy colleagues smell it they are more likely to tidy up. That’s what several psychologists have discovered, including Jonathan Haidt, Henk Aarts, Aaron Kay and John A. Bargh.

It’s called priming. We are unaware of it happening to us. It affects your attention, memories, performance and relationships. It is prompting one towards something, for example taking a certain action, such as cleaning up the nook, or holding a certain opinion. As Yale students who’d volunteered to be part of a study were sent, one-by-one, down a hallway to the study they passed a lab assistant in the hallway.

As the assistant’s hands were full, holding a clipboard, textbooks, papers and a cup of either hot or iced coffee, he asked each student for a hand with the cup. A few minutes later the students read about a fictional person then ranked that individual on a range from warm, thoughtful and social to cold, selfish and less social. You guessed it. Those who’d held the cup of hot coffee were more likely to rank that individual more positively than the students who’d held the iced java. They were “primed” to do so. Bargh and Robert Wyer relate this effect to “the automaticity of everyday life.” As you’ve anticipated, priming can prompt “good” and “bad” behavior.

Read more here.

Living Well by Turning Attention to What Matters

“Art is never necessary. It is merely indispensable.”
- New York Times art critic, Michael Kimmelman

“Regarding SPAM, I'm comfortable with the size of my penis, I don't care that young girls want me, I've got more than enough insurance, and I can't help you escape from jail in Ghana, so please, go jam somebody else's in-box.”
- Mark T. Gould, New Haven, Connecticut

“Sex is about appetite. Love is about endurance.”
- Jack Valenti

“Creativity isn't the conclusions you have drawn, but how you pry them back open.”
- David Crismon, Oklahoma City, Oklahoma

Watch Out! That Video Camera “Knows” How You Feel….Maybe

Say you’re walking down the street, or through a store or airport – and your mind is racing with thoughts about your life. Or your last conversation. Or the jiggling bottom of the woman ahead of you in that impossibly short summer skirt and skimpy top. Or a billboard advertisement.

Now your private emotions may not be private anymore when you are out and about in public. Your feelings can be “read” in real time if a special video camera catches your facial expression. That’s the assertion anyway of some German researchers. Advertisers are already dancing with glee.

Here how it (ostensibly) works in a first application under development at the Fraunhofer Institute for Integrated Circuits. A video camera records the crowd that passes an ad in a public place. Using algorithm-based software, the video can zero in on the faces, count the number of people observing the ad, distinguish between men and women and then analyze their expressions. Apparently the technology can register whether a man or woman looks happy or sad. The researchers are working on detection of other emotions including surprise and anger.

Worried about your privacy? The technology, researchers say, could also be used to detect driver alertness. That still seems like invading my space.

The “joke” from the man “you shouldn’t screw with”

… shows the true measure of this "self-indulgent" risk-taker.

Here’s the punch line for me in this story about the latest adventure of someone who’s “performed the alchemy of turning millions into billions", someone with a “boatload of ego":
"Rarely does one have the privilege
to witness vulgar ostentation displayed on such a scale."

Now read the rest of the story and what this man considered his hidden-in-plain-sight inside joke on people who sought to honor him - and on their country.

Sausalito “cottage”?

Deidre Woolard at Luxist provides lovely photos of Joy Luck Club and Bonesetter’s Daughter author Amy Tan’s “cottage.” A three-bedroom, three-story home with an “exercise pool” and hot tub, standing at the end of a lane in my village, Sausalito.

And, while Luxist notes it’s for sale for $2.395 million, Zillow shows it as sold for "just" $1,995,000. Mmm Sausalito in a slump?

Pray tell then, what’s a home and what is a cottage here?

At the other extreme in size, I think of the tiny yet lovely and functional Katrina cottage, the “size of a McMansion bathroom.”

Peculiar Studies in Psychology

Inspired by the bestseller, Freakanomic’s coverage of apparently odd economic behavior, Jeremy Dean at the engrossing PsychBlog announced today that he was looking for weird psychology studies to share with his blog readers.

To prime the pump he offered a true oddity in the English tradition: “Personal space invasions in the lavatory: suggestive evidence for arousal.” Maybe the Freakonomics co-authors and Dean might join forces to study how to get doctors to wash their hands more often.

Then see his top ten overall favorite psych studies. They include "What Are Babies Watching?" and "a successful form of psychological therapy (for depression) could be based on telling people their thoughts are mistaken." Also, did you know a slow smile attracts or that "writing affectionate thoughts about close friends and family can reduce your cholesterol levels?"

Go Blank to Gain Focus

You can reduce stress and increase your ability to focus through practicing meditation a new study shows. No a surprise to those who have long practiced stilling their minds yet gratifying to hear of new research that buttresses what is a sometimes derided way to spend time.

Remarkable Dr. Richard Davidson of the University of Wisconsin in Madison, says it is the “ability to release thoughts that pop into mind that frees the brain to attend to more rapidly changing things and events in the world at large." Plus the practice improves your immune system and your ability to read others changing facial expressions. Downside? It takes three months of intense training to make the shift. But worth it, eh?

Springwise picked up

my tip on the new site where women can get free products in exchange for giving their candid feedback: SheSpeaks.

Check out this fun trendspotting site that covers the globe, with the aid of savvy spotters like you.

Here's one of my recent favorites.

How Many Stories Have You Lived?

"The average life takes about 17 hours to tell. Every life story I've ever collected has ended up taking up almost the exact amount of tape. It's odd, when you think about it, that in all those years, each of us has only collected less than a day of interesting material."

That’s the startling finding from the former New York Times music critic, Neil Straus after he switched over to interviewing people (including a porn star) to ghostwrite their books.

Meaning of Money

Thanks to Susan Mernit, let me share this "quote of the day" I read yesterday yet could not get out of my mind:

"Here's what else is new and exciting (or terrible) in money:

There is real poverty among the soldiers who fight our wars.

There are fist fights to get children into $30,000 a year kindergartens and pre-schools in the right neighborhoods in Manhattan.

There are 40 million Americans without health care insurance.

There are almost 40 million baby boomers with no savings for retirement.

There is a long waiting list for Bentleys at the dealership in Beverly Hills.

There are soldiers' wives selling blood to buy toys for their kids."

-Ben Stein, writing in The American Spectator about today's social economics.

Ben's columns are always colorful and punchy-to-the-point and whether you share his perspective ( I sometimes do not) or just want insights about how to say it better, you'll never be bored. Discover a priceless "course" in his writing. He's written sixteen books including How to Ruin Your Life, A License to Steal, Michael Milken and the Conspiracy to Bilk the Nation and The View from Sunset Boulevard.

By the way, he may look familar to you as he played the part of the boring teacher in the movie, "Ferris Bueller's Day Off." Stein is also an attorney, author, economist, actor, and was once a quiz show host and the host of Comedy Central's "Win Ben Stein's Money".